A Blog A Day

It\’s a blog where I write about the extraordinary and the ordinary things going on in my life.

Got to Have Faith

The movie, ” I Am Legend, ” has got to be the most depressing movie I’ve seen recently. I was just crying my heart out after watching it. It’s the kind of movie the depresses and really makes you cry.

It’s a sci-fi horror film about the last man on earth battling monsters. But that’s just the superficial plot. Essentially, it’s about a man battling his inner demons–grief, loneliness, sorrow, sadness and suffering.

When I watch a movie, I try to relate it with my life and with my practice. I don’t just watch a movie. I think about its implications and try to relate it to my life. Although there are some movies that you just watch and discard later on. But there are just some movies that you have to ponder on and think about long after the credits have rolled up.

I can really relate to the character. He is a man battling his inner demons as am I. And he’s an unhappy man who has lost so much. A man who embodies suffering. He has accepted his unhappiness that he has actually lost hope that he will ever find others like him. He has actually given up hope and at one point tried to commit suicide to end his misery. But just when we lose hope, light finds a way into darkness.

I almost gave up on my life a few months ago. I just couldn’t accept my karma. I couldn’t accept what happened to me. I almost killed myself. I really did give up hope that I’d find happiness. But then, a miracle happened. I found hope in the form of Buddhism.

In the movie, Robert Neville is rescued by a stranger. Just when he lost all hope, hope found him. The stranger saved his life and made him realize his purpose.

Humans are so quick to embrace suffering but are so slow to accept happiness. When Robert Neville met his rescuer, he couldn’t accept that he had finally found a survivor like him. And when his rescuer told him about having faith, he was quick to dismiss it.

Humans embrace suffering so willingly. And when happiness comes to us or when hope finds us, we don’t accept is so readily. Humans also forget that we have a purpose on this earth. That everything happens for a reason. There are no accidents. There is no such thing as fate. Everything has a purpose. Even suffering has a purpose.

But the thing is, we don’t have to suffer more than we should. There is redemption. There is hope. There is an end to suffering. And we are so quick to dismiss that as well.

I am sad and unhappy right now. But I know that in the end, wisdom will come to me. And I will know what to do. I will find a way to end my suffering.

I know I am just depressed because my ex-boyfriend has come back. And I thought I was happy with Richard. And then, my ex-boyfriend comes along wanting us to start again.

I have to have faith that I didn’t just meet Richard by accident. That he has a purpose to fulfill in my life. And I have to have faith that I will choose the right path to take.

Faith is really just about believing that life has brought us this far so we can choose whether to be happy or to be unhappy. And may I choose happiness. May happiness prevail.

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